Open Letter to a $5 Page of Content

Dear $5 page of content,

I appreciate you taking time to hear me out. I apologize in advance if my clear sentence structure and proper use of English gets a little confusing – if possible, I’ll try to forget some punctuation and skip some verbs for you.

But I am a little concerned, $5 page of content, because you just keep on adding more noise to the marketplace. A bargain is a bargain, but you are offering something that is usually worthless – and many cash-strapped business owners simply don’t know any better.

While I know how little you typically offer, not everyone shares my insight. You are even making confused business owners call me, and ask why I charge so much more than you. You are upsetting their sense of value. But since you are so insanely cheap, I can see why they get confused!

I usually tell them that I offer something completely different than you, little $5 page of content. Sure, we both use words, and we both claim to know what we are doing. The similarities probably end there, so let me offer you three simple ideas of why.

1. I have experience. More than seven years spent as a professional copywriter has afforded me the opportunity to work for dozens of independent small businesses and well-known international brands. My experiences with these businesses means understanding what will work best in a variety of situations. I can help leverage tone, language and vehicle to reach specific audiences both on and off-line. My work allows my clients to align strategies across different mediums. In 20 words or less, when needed. I rely heavily on research, and whenever possible have split-tested and optimized my efforts. I constantly use and update analytic data to measure my work’s impact, but I am sure you do all most some of that too.
2. I have an English degree. From a real university, after 4 years of dedicated study. I have studied and even taught students more about grammar, language choices, editing and creative writing. I allowed other people (like professors, businesses and publishers) to tell me I was a writer before I advertised being one. But just so you know – owning a hose and an ax does not really make you a fireman. Having a frying pan does not make you a chef, either. And all that studying encouraged me to find trusted and accepted rules about what I write. I might not refer as often to my Strunk and White anymore, but I still have it (properly worn and earmarked) next to my latest copy of the Chicago Manual of Style, my Thesaurus and an old-fashioned dictionary with real pages. I routinely use reference material to double-check I am correct – I am that much of a nerd. Since I have seen many examples of you not even using a simple spell check, my guess is you don’t put as much value in study…in fact, it is often hard to determine what you value at all beyond that $5 price tag.
3. My pages work. This one is hard for me to discuss with you, $5 page of content, because I so rarely see you. Sure, Google alerts are great to keep me apprised of all the range and depth you offer, but I simply don’t have time to click back far enough to see how you are doing back there in page three or four. If you’d like, I can introduce you to the top of the SERPs – which is an acronym for Search Engine Result Pages. You might wonder what it takes, $5 page of content, to make that leap up 30 or 40 results to get into the game on the first page. Regardless of the subject matter, I can probably just refer you to the 2 previous points and cover all my bases.

I’ll wait, if there are some points here you’d like to let sink in. I realize 3 can be a lot of ideas to take in all in one day, and some of these words do have multiple syllables. But wait, I should have known you have already copied this without reading or understanding it, and I can expect to see it authored under your name sometime soon. I’ll be anxiously watching those Google Alerts for you!

Thanks for letting me vent here, $5 page of content. I do know there are some occasions when a small investment really pays off, times when the price tag belies the quality of the work. I know that very rarely, a $5 page of content works perfectly. Or, if a company wants a bunch of low quality content for an alternative purpose (such as link building), you can offer something of value to them. But I also know these instances are going to be few and far between, and most people will never get what they need from a $5 web page.

So please, feel free to piss off. You won’t be missed.

Marty Lamers owns a Freelance SEO Copywriting company you can visit at Articulayers.Com. Since 2001, Articulayers has been fixing the world, one word at a time.

About the Author

Marty Lamers owns a Freelance SEO Copywriting company named Articulayers. Since 2001, Articulayers has been fixing the world, one word at a time.

Visit Marty Lamers's Website